Burn Out? Burn Up with this 5 strategies To Help That Adult Member in Your Family Who is or Seems Unproductive .

5 strategies To Help That Adult Member in Your Family Who is or Seems Unproductive (or are you the adult?)

Compiled and written by Teacher Amos for The Roots Television.

We are blessed and abled differently,
Let us support one another especially now,
Take a moment and call or even send a text message to your dad or mum or friend,
I mean that whom you’ve not spoken to for a while!
Ask how they’re fairing on – and if able, offer to help before they ask!
Because some will never mention…. yet they’re suffering!


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Today’s quiz is (we quote):
“Many families have at least one adult member who is unproductive – relies on other people yet He or She is neither sick nor elderly. What strategies work to empower such a person?’
Question asked by Susan Catherine Keter on the group 52 - Week Savings Challenge Kenya.

So many comments were shared and here on TRT we will try share the most impactive. In the comments section, let’s keep the conversation going and help each other grow.

Lely Nero here sounded like to define what our parents/guardians and most first-borns go through…!
“Funniest thing is that they supported you when you were unable, young and paid your school fee with their shoddy jobs. Once you get a formal job your thinking changes. The way you look at life changes as well. You abandon such relatives and the next time you meet them doing shoddy jobs, thin and emaciated – you start to see them like refugees and don’t even want to imagine you spent years together, spent nights together, shared the same bed and same table for meals, played together, gave you protection while you were young and saved your life many times!”

But again, as a parent or guardian or firstborn it is tough to forget that it’s your sibling – particularly when things go wrong for them. They got families, they become too religious to reason – but again it’s the lack of concern that pushed them to that direction.
It is tough guys!

Joseph Mwita says
People are gifted differently.
Therefore friends, to empower these brothers and sisters and cousins and uncles of ours…;

1. Share with them available opportunities based on their capabilities. This can range from a job opening to available business opportunities. Here at TRT we add that - be sure that you know the person so that if you are to recommend them for a job, they won’t go there, steal and land you in problems or spoil your cv.

2. Do not define and manage their point of view on what success looks like to them. What is ambition to you is a day’s job to someone else. Your measure of success is not proportionate to the next individual.

3. Manage your energy and expectations from them. The single source of disappointment I have observed from most people who help them is the expectations and perceived level of output we bestow upon the ‘failed’ individual. The energy and ultimately expectations on what success should be verses the reality creates disappointment. If you manage your point of view, output to what is not within your control will be nothing more than that.
Just output!

4. Encourage and support them. A good support system can be a great game changer to the most unproductive individuals. In employment we offer performance improvement plans (PIP) from angle of knowing the individuals involved are capable of attaining desired results with a bit of guidance. Otherwise, it would be a desperate course of action. Show them what success can look like but limit your guidance to assisting them realize their potential.

5. Seek professional help. Everything we do and know is learnt. No one is born a performer. It takes individual effort and intentions. Sometimes the difference between a performing individual and the opposite is the lack of a person to guide and walk them through the journey. Help is available through coaching, mentorship, apprenticeships etc.
Take home from Susan is that:
What I have learned is that nothing in life is constant. The person who is high flying today might hit rock bottom 10 years or 20 years from now. The person who is stuck today might be thriving 10 years or 20 years from now!
Whatever your current circumstances is or are, don’t despise or mistreat another person because you don’t know about tomorrow. Relationship are fragile, once destroyed they are difficult to restore. Sometimes it is difficult to know how to get a stuck person to become productive but don’t destroy the relationship.
Keep your distance if you have to but don’t bang the door shut on your way out. You just might need that person one day.
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